Escaping The Mundane

I can't do it... I simply cannot get up every morning and drive to the same place and do the exact same thing. Every morning I am ripped awake into a day I absolutely dread. I strategically  press the snooze button careful not to purposely turn my alarm off altogether, and when I do, I pathetically justify that I gave working a good try, which I hardly have but my toes brush across the clean sheets and my body sinks deeper into the embrace of the mattress and my fuzzy tired reasoning is so gosh darn convincing that while I'm still trying to figure it out I'm calling work and telling them I won't be in today, heck I won't be in ever, and then I fall peacefully back to sleep.

So many do not understand this heart wrenching feeling. Despite popular belief, this has nothing to do with laziness, immaturity, fear of failure or fear success for that matter. They tell me that it wasn't easy for them either to get used to going to work everyday, but that I will "settle in."

But, on the other hand, there are so many that know exactly what I'm talking about. Because they too do not want to settle in, they want to live! They would trade comfort for adventure if only they had the courage.

I'm at an Italian restaurant with a friend and we take a small lapse in our pleasant chat to pick our meal. I see the Fettuccine Alfredo. Oh how I love this dish. I know exactly what will be placed in front of me, I know I like it, but what is this over here, I can't even pronounce it. I don't know how it will turn out, it could be a total bust, but it could turn out so much greater than anything I've ever tasted. This is how I see life. We each have choices to be made, entrees to eat. Life is a menu.

My fiance is in the mist of the epitome of life choices. He is trying to choose between money and poverty, I mean happiness. He is trying to choose a life. He reached out to me in desperation the other day, "Carrie, I need to know what you want. I know what you say now, but is there a slight chance in a couple of years that you are going to want a beautiful house filled with expensive crap?" (That's the gist of what I heard. If I want those things, or will want them, he will take the CPA and settle into the cubicle life of accounting.) We looked at each other in that moment and realized that we cannot make a decision based on money.

So I'm making a choice right now to escape the mundane, and I'm taking him with me.